Today…well yesterday, I vaccumed and painted some molding by the floor cause there were ugly marks on them. It’s really boring…painting molding…because you are all alone, concentrating on not spilling paint on the floor. And all that concentrating makes me tired. So I end up being extremely bored and tired afterwards….

Lately I have been having really bad dreams. Reoccuring dreams that wake me  up in the middle of the night. I think I’m just worrying about how summer will be over and I have to go back to school…I’m really afraid of school. It’s kind of weird. But sometimes it can get very unpleasant, where I don’t know what to do. Last semester, I was waiting for the printer to print something…I was in a hurry, tired, stressed out from working on the thing all night…and I was already 10 minutes late to class….I felt this pain in my left arm…a constricted pain, and I felt like I was going to throw up. That stuff happens a lot during school. And I don’t want to go back to that. It really scares me. My friend told me to think of positive things right before I knock out. So yesterday I did that….I thought of fun stuff, positive things and feelings. I woke up in the middle of the night from a bad dream, but I don’t remember anything about it…if it was school related or not. I just woke up with lots of mixed, negative emotions. 

I saw Public Enemy today. I liked their clothes…I want a hat like that…

In my household, there has been a continuous argument between my parents and my sister. Ever since my sister reached that age when girls start to pluck their eyebrows, she has kept them fairly thin, and that bugs my parents. My dad will jokingly say “I can’t see them anymore”, meaning that her brows are too thin. And she always lashes back with “I like them like this, okay?” My sister would always get compliments from her friends about her eyebrows and I was kind of ignored. Personally, I like thicker eyebrows and have never tried to make mine thinner. I like them the way they are. So the other day, my friend’s mom, who is a makeup artist, said, “Lorik, I really like your eyebrows. They frame your face well.” First time I was complimented on my eyebrows. It felt really cool.

Today was a weird day. Something sad happened that unleashed a bunch of emotions and memories that I hadn’t felt since I was a kid. MJ was my sister’s and my hero as a kid. We wanted to be like him! We would get together with out best friends and watch him on tv and dance to his songs~ Those were the greatest days, and I’m happy that those days were filled with his music. MJ = my childhood. One of our favorites by him was the Earth Song, and when we were young, my sister and I decided that if either one of us would die, we would play that song on our funerals. And today…it felt strange and wrong, because he is not supposed to be gone….we played that song first~

On a random note. I made pancakes today.

Over the weekend I was at Arroyo Grande which is a little bit further up from Santa Barbara. My cousin’s wife’s family lives there and we really like to go visit them. The weather was very windy, but it’s so nice to breathe in fresh air~ We went and saw a carshow, walked around town, went to some clothing stores here and there, and went to the movies. It was a very nice weekend spent with fun people~

I bought two pairs shoes. One pair are heels which I desperately need. I can’t wear very high ones because I can’t walk in them and because I become too tall. I found a pair of black, shiny heels that are nice and fairly comfortable~ I also bought a pair of addidas…I haven’t owned addidas shoes since I was….five? I liked them…but was kind of hesitating to get them…what do you guys think?

Watering the flowers is always fun! I pretend that when I talk, they can hear me~ I like to think of myself as their helper <3

My friend and I have been playing lots of Rhythm Heaven!!!! It’s very fun ANDDD frustrating because..I swear sometimes I feel like the game is purposely failing me! This song is stuck in my head.